Sometimes I feel like I’m talking to myself when I give them an instruction. But there are lots of strategies we can use to get our children to comply with our requests. Try implementing a handful of these tips consistently, and you’ll see an improvement in no time:

Look your child in the eye when you’re giving them a direction. Just like us, our kids sometimes are so engrossed with the computer, a book, a video game, or a television show that they might not listen to us fully when we interrupt them. Call your child’s name, look them in the eye, and make sure that you have their attention when you issue your command.

Ask your child to repeat the instruction back to you. If you want to make sure that they heard what you said to them, ask them to repeat it. The act of saying the direction out loud will help them remember it and will assure you that they understood what you were asking of them.

Break your instructions down into simple one-step actions. Instead of saying “Clean your room,” try saying “Make your bed” or “Put your toys in your toy box.” You might end up having to issue more commands by breaking your instructions down in this way, but your child will be more successful in accomplishing the goals you put forth for them.

Phrase your command as a statement, not a question. If you expect your child to do something, then you need to state it as a fact. You don’t have to be to stern, but in a matter of fact voice, state what you expect them to do. For instance, if you ask them “Will you unload the dishwasher,” then they might just say no! If given the choice, who wouldn’t say no? Instead, simply state “Unload the dishwasher.”

Don’t use the word “let’s” in your directions. If you say “Let’s brush your teeth,” then that sounds like you and your child are about to go brush their teeth. Like you, the parent, are actually going to be involved in the tooth brushing process. Now if you have a toddler that’s one thing, but if your child is capable of brushing their teeth on their own, then you would be better off saying “Go brush your teeth” and then let them complete the task independently.

Be prepared to follow through if they don’t comply. Whenever you give an instruction or command, you need to be ready to follow up immediately and make sure that your child is complying. If they don’t comply within a reasonable amount of time, be prepared to issue the instruction again with a warning of the consequence for noncompliance.

Praise. When they do comply with your command, be sure to give them verbal praise. You don’t have to go over the top with your praise, but it’s important to acknowledge that you know that they completed the task and that you are proud of them for doing so.